I try not to post when I'm angry or upset. But right now I'm both. So I just want to say one simple thing:
If you are considering doing something, and are worried it is going to upset a bereaved parent...don't do it. Please. Especially if it's something that will cause ongoing pain. There's almost always an alternative that either won't hurt at all, or will hurt less.
Please, I beg you. Be sensitive.
It really is that simple.